By in Yoga & Pilates

Why Acknowledging Your Feelings is Important

In my work as a Movement Therapist and Pilates Practitioner I ask my clients this question over and over “How does that feel?” Often the answer is “Fine.” or “Okay.” This answer, which is so common, makes me usually re-phrase my question and ask more directly about the sensations the client is experiencing during the exercise or movement they are doing.

The problem is that in our modern, western society we do not give a lot of attention to feelings and sensations. We do not have time for such things. It is all about being tough and carrying on. Regardless of how we may feel, if at all possible we carry on, because we have obligations to full-fill and things to get on with. Besides, others may think we are egocentric or even weak if we show too much of an interest in our own feelings or let them slow us down. We simply can not afford to indulge in our feelings.

So when I work with people in movement and I ask how something is feeling, it is not at all surprising I get an answer that implies that nothing is terribly wrong and therefore not worth dwelling on any further. Lets just get the exercises done, right? That can be the focus and attitude of clients and fitness professionals alike. I used to be more like that too until I learned about the nervous system, the relationship between mental health and physical health and I began to specialise in working with traumatic stress.

Nowadays, when I hear that someone is feeling “fine”, I wonder what that actually means. I wonder, how do you know that you feel “fine”? What is “fine”? Where do you feel “fine”?

There are many reasons for why I am so curious about this. I get the sense that some clients assume that the reason I am asking how something is feeling is just about me checking that what ever we are doing is not harming them. Of course that is most important, however I am asking you to tell me about what you are experiencing in that moment for a whole lot more reasons. What is the feeling in your body that brought you to your session today? Or was it an entirely cognitive decision? If so, how do you feel about being here now? And as you are spending time in your body and exploring movements, just exactly how does that feel? Do you recognise that part of your body is tensing up? Can you feel the movement revealing tension somewhere else? Is there a sense of satisfaction that comes with the flow of the movement? Is there a level of anxiety about asking your body to do a certain movement? What is the sensation after you have achieved it? Does your body feel lighter, heavier, more rooted to the ground? What has happened to the rusty feeling you felt in your hip when you walked in earlier, has that changed? Do you feel more energised now? More at peace? More confident about the rest of your day?

There is a lot of sensation to explore when you are actively spending time in your body in motion. Besides the obvious physical benefits we gain from being physically active, we can learn a lot about ourselves when we are more self aware and mindful in the moment. And it is not just for novelty. We all go through rough times in life. Sometimes we have to endure a lot emotionally, perhaps someone close to us dies, or we loose our job or we have a car accident. Sometimes emotional stress builds up over a longer period of time where we struggle at work or with our family. We feel that we can not give into the emotions that want to overwhelm us. We need to pull ourselves together and deal with the problem or deal with just getting on with life. This habit that most of us have, is a main cause for traumatic stress and chronic pain disorders. Our body needs to be able to work through the emotional distress physically as much as we need to resolve the issue in our head, if not more so. If we hold it all in and ignore it, it gets stored up and will make itself known eventually in some form or another, as for example anxiety, depression, blood pressure, hormonal problems or pain.

Once we have kept our feelings suppressed and locked up for a while, it can be risky to open that door. By suddenly reconnecting with all that stored up emotion we can overwhelm ourselves and even cause re-traumatisation. So I do understand the reluctance to acknowledge feelings and sensations. It puts us in a vulnerable place. That is why we need to do this carefully and a little step at a time, with the support of those we trust and anything that helps us resource ourselves to feel save.

In Pilates, and generally, the movement and fitness world there does not tend to be much or any understanding for this subject. In the fitness world, and even in the world of rehabilitation there is surprisingly little focus on the nervous system, which is just as much part of our physical body as our muscles and bones. It is my passion to help change this. I am raising awareness in Pilates Teacher training about how somatic movement work (consciously experiencing the movements we do) can support healing from traumatic stress and trauma induced illness. Meanwhile I continue to learn about the nervous system and trauma in our body and support those that choose to trust me and choose to explore my question of “How do you feel?” in their body with mindful curiosity.

If you would like to speak to Kristin at The Body Matters about using somatic movement therapy and Pilates to help reduce and resolve stress, anxiety, depression or trauma related chronic pain or fatigue, please call 01702 714968.

Kristin Loeer
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